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Tag Archives: Divorce

‘Adolph Hitler’ Ordered to be Held In Custody In New Jersey


One day, you take your family to the grocery store to order a decorated birthday cake for your youngest son.  There’s just one problem, they refuse to decorate the cake for you.  Not because you don’t have the money for it.  Not because they ran out of icing or cake.  But, because they refuse to write your son’s name on the cake, his name, Adolph Hitler Campbell. After the story of this incident broke in the local news papers, child protective services showed up on the doorstep of the Campbell’s, ultimately, child services took all four of their children into custody. Three of their four children are named after Nazi figures or terminology. This happened in New Jersey in 2009.

Fast forward to present day. There was a hearing in Superior Court to decide if the children should be held in State custody or be returned to their parents. Superior Court Judge Robert Reed ruled that the children should continue to be detained in the states care. A decision Adolph’s father strongly disagreed with saying  it was based purely on the names of his children rather than the couple’s ability to serve as parents.

“These kids weren’t abused. Our kids weren’t taken because of abuse,” Campbell said. “I’m honest about who I am and what I am.” He further added “If I have to give up my Nazism, then so be it. I’ll do it,” he said. The children are “more my heart and soul and everything than anything.”

The Campbell’s are reported to have separated. An interesting interconnected note is that the Nazi Party recently filed the paper work in Washington D.C. to have their own lobbyist to the Congress of the United States in April, 2012, and were permitted to do so.

Here is one thing to consider. In America we have a constitutional right to the freedom of association, no matter what the social astigmatism is. We are protected from persecution by the government for being associated with any political ideology. If someone wants to follow communist ideology, in America they are free to do so, even though I strongly disagree with their decision in that choice, I support their right to subscribe to communism. Because I support the U.S. Constitution. We have a right to free and open debate.

I do not like anything that promotes Nazism, I find their actions both past and present, to be detestable. However, I don’t support an over reaching all-powerful government bureaucracy whether Federal, State, or Local in nature.

Here is another point of view to ponder.

Muhammad is a very popular name in the world right now, and many young boys are being named Muhammad currently.

In AD 627, Muhammad committed an atrocity against the last remaining major tribe of Jews in Medina: the Qurayza. Muhammad beheaded or had beheaded 750 Jews, adults and prepubescent males, and gathered all the women together as slaves. Muhammad, also had taken to himself a wife, a young girl of the age of around 9. He was middle-aged at the time of their wedding. The Hadith chronicles the story of Muhammad marrying the 9 year old girl of his friend,the girl was named Aisha. The Southern Baptists had gotten into some hot water over referring to Muhammad as a “Demon Possessed Pedophile” in 2002.

If Muhammad hated the Jews, and killed them. And Adolph hated the Jews, and killed them. Why is it more politically correct to name children Muhammad than Adolph. Is it in our psyche as a nation to abhor the name Adolph, because his atrocities were more recent, and closer to the surface of our knowledge than that of Muhammad’s atrocities? I would say that is part of it. However, consider this point of view, or are we so afraid of being politically incorrect to tell the truth about both men, because Islam calls one of them a prophet? Are we to afraid to criticise one because he is a so-called “religious” figure? And, equally, are we so easy to criticise the other one because its socially acceptable to do so?

In America, does the government have the right to take children into custody, because of their name? Where no credible evidence of abuse can be determined beyond a reasonable doubt? Can they break up a family because of your decision to name your children what you seen fit?  Should the authorities be investigating Islamic families that are naming their boys Muhammad?  If the answer is yes, we are in a world of hurt.

Robert E. Stage Jr.

Adolph, with his parents Heath and Deborah

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Family law in Ohio, and how it affects Fathers, Mothers, and their Children


In Ohio, the current statutes are skewed in the favor of the custodial parent when concerning contempt of court proceedings. Let me explain, if you are the non-custodial parent and you are named in your court order to pay child support, if you were to fall behind (even through no fault of your own) after 30 days delinquency you will find yourself on the receiving end of a summons. The CSEA through the Ohio Department of Job and Family Service acts on behalf of the child (also the custodial parent) and summons you to court to answer a charge of contempt. This legal action costs $0.00 to the custodial parent.

Now, if you are the custodial parent, you are able to sever visitation from the non-custodial parent and the children, causing you to be in contempt. When the non-custodial parent wants to remedy this issue and continue visitation he or she must hire legal counsel, pay a fee to the court to have the case heard (most cases $400.00), most attorney fees for this action can run between $600.00 to $1000.00. So to summarize, if you are a non-custodial parent it will cost you, $1000.00 to $1400.00 just to get the custodial parent into court to answer for a contempt charge (this still does not guarantee you will see your children). And if you are a custodial parent, after 30 days delinquency on child support payments, the legal system/state agency becomes your advocate, at no cost to you, and sends a summons to the non-custodial parent.

The fourteenth amendment to the U.S. Constitution section1.

All persons born or naturalized in the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States and of the State wherein they reside. No State shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens of the United States; nor shall any State deprive any person of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws.

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Proposed Legislation – State of Ohio – Domestic Relations

Whereas the family has been the foundation of society from the origins of the world. So then, because a child (or children) have been naturally appointed with a father and a mother, and a child (or children) being a gift from God, it is of the utmost importance that they have relationships with both parents to sustain the blessings of this life, and so they do not forget their ancestors and familial heritage.

Also,

Whereas it is good and prudent that governments be instituted among men, and government; being a reflection of the current order of the institution of the American family, I, Robert E. Stage Jr. propose amending the domestic relations segment of the Ohio Revised Code to make the law more equitable among custodial and non-custodial parents.

A. When a custodial parent shall fail to comply with the court appointed enjoyed parenting time for a period of more than 30 days, the CSEA / Job and family services case worker shall, in a written and sworn affidavit notify the county prosecutor of the alleged contempt of court. Upon receiving the sworn affidavit, the county prosecutor shall file a charge of contempt of court against the custodial parent in the court of the original verdict and decree.

(1.) The non-custodial parent must show causal for the aforementioned legal action by acquiring police reports for each infraction of the court appointed enjoyed parenting time order.

(2.) The non-custodial parent shall be wholly responsible for any and all evidence and its gathering (also its delivery to the CSEA / Job and Family Services caseworker).

B. If found guilty of contempt, punishment of the custodial parent shall be equal to the existing statutes for child support delinquency.

(1.) Upon first conviction of contempt, the custodial parent shall be incarcerated for a period of up to 30 days and pay up to a $250.00 fine.

(2.) Upon second conviction of contempt, the custodial parent shall be incarcerated for a period of up to 60 days and pay up to a $500.00 fine.

(3.) Upon third conviction of contempt, the custodial parent shall be incarcerated for a period of up to 90 days and pay up to a $1000.00 fine.

I am submitting this proposal to my state representatives, if you support this proposal please leave your comments stating such. Thank you.

Also, please reblog and share this with Facebook and Twitter with as many people as you can.

 

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Some really good real world advice.


How do you feel about the current state of family law and family courts? I’m sure there are vast differences of opinion when discussing this subject. Many parents want to spend as much time with their children as they can. This makes a split of the family unit really stressful on all those involved, especially children. The courts can only slice the week so many ways to accommodate those parties involved. Also, financial matters come into to play with support orders, alimony and the bickering over who gets to claim the children on their taxes, who carries insurance, etc. A wise man once told me; work as many details out as you can with your ex-partner before either of you ever speak to an attorney. This will save you some money. It may not save you a lot of money, but you’re going to need every bit you can keep. If you are able, have a separation agreement loosely typed up and some idea of what your visitation schedule might look like, you will be well on your way to saving money, and time, if these things are agreed to before hand, it saves the arguing later, thus saving time with the attorney. Any time you can save at the attorney; the better off you are. Time is money! You’re going to find that once you involve the attorney, things usually turn nasty. Attorney’s make money from any deviation they can cause in the case, this includes, but is not limited to, telling you; well you can get a lot more money than you are asking your partner for”, “well you should get to claim both children, instead of alternating years” and of course “now listen here honey, you’ve put in a lot of time and effort into this relationship over the years, now that’s gotta be worth something”! Ideally parents would want to set up an agreeable visitation schedule, an agreeable dollar amount for support and all the particulars of taxes, insurance, etc. Most attorney’s work on an hourly rate, ranging anywhere from $100.00 per hour all the way to $300.00 an hour for “proud” attorney services, of course these numbers can go higher, these are merely the market prices in central Ohio. In any type of “fight”– or “war”; in some divorces, there are winners and losers. The worst part is almost 10 times out of 10 the children are always the losers and the attorneys are the winners and the parents are left somewhere in  the middle “purgatory”.

I was one of those guys who took a referral from a family member for my legal representation for my divorce. Sadly I didn’t do enough homework when it came to researching the attorney before I hired him to represent me. I had mediocre representation at best. I was charged a flat fee of $2700.00 for “divorce with children”. I never received an itemized invoice for services rendered, even after asking for one on several occasions. Whats even worse in my case, I paid for two divorces, just before the paperwork was filed I had given my ex-wife $2100.00 to pay the new house mortgage and incidentals for our children. I later found out, my ex never paid the mortgage, she used the money I gave her to hire an attorney to sue me for divorce. Aint that the luck! Actually she didn’t pay one mortgage payment on the new house she lived in for 14 months, and this is just plain greedy, after being in the new home, she let all her family members throw her a “house-warming” party where she received gifts for moving into a house I paid $2000.00 to have built, that she never paid a dime on for 14 months…. and lived in for FREE. 

Heres another piece of advice I didn’t know until I found myself searching for a “good” divorce lawyer, always; 100% of the time go with the reputable “local yocal” attorney in the municipality where your case will be heard. What this does for you is it  cozys you slightly closer to the judge hearing your case. You really want your attorney and the judge to already have a good working relationship. Think about it. Do you want the guy or gal who has worked with the judge many times over and maybe have shared a drink or a golf game with? Or do you want the guy or gal who has never seen said judge, never! I think you see my point. We all wish justice could be blind, but every now and again; she PEEKS and the scales are tipped! In the real world it really does matter who you know. I know I may sound a little jaded and cynical, but remember folks, I’ve walked the gauntlet already.

When there are children involved in your divorce, always, always, always, involve a family counsellor and a mediator, these two positions are going to be your lifeline! I cannot recommend this strongly enough; because this is where I lost the most ground, I did not do this. Take for instance, getting a counsellor involved, what this does is allows all parties involved to vent to someone other than the person they might despise at that particular moment in time. It saves a lot of unnecessary hurt feelings in what is already a tough situation. Getting a mediator involved will reduce any dis-agreements that pop up along the negotiating process, you know, “bumps” in the road. Also involving a mediator helps with dis-agreements in the future, because if everyone is on the same page and everyone knows exactly what their agreeing to, It’s hard to plead ignorant later over visitation, support, or what ever might be the pressing issue of the day.

You should always use ALL the tools at your disposal! Do extensive research, ask for references from your attorney’s former clients. Use the internet to view forums, and bar association writings regarding certain lawyers. Go to the library, study family law or read books on the psychological effects on children who suffer through such trauma as divorce causes. When you get right down to it; next to a death in the family; there really isn’t any trauma like a divorce. A divorce is the natural world of a child (no matter how bad their environment is) being un-naturally ripped into two pieces. After it is ripped like the tearing of your flesh, then the “distance” of the “divorce altered relationship” begins to set in. Which can cause all kinds of odd reactions from your children, depression, isolating themselves, drawing “dark” pictures and so on.

I will leave you with this, do everything you can to speak respectfully of the other parent in the presence of your child, in their eyes you can “kill” the other parent with just a few careless hurtful words. Always make time to share and talk about how your child(ren) feel, and to an extent how you feel also now, remember divorce is new to you and your child(ren). Take advantage of every opportunity to encourage them to spend quality time with the “other” parent (no matter how devastating your alone time is for you).

I was not afforded many kind words in my divorce, this ultimately destroyed two of the best father daughter, father son relationships you ever witnessed. Now the relationships are dead. I have become as a distant memory in my children’s minds, I have become but a whisper in a hurricane.

Robert E Stage Jr.

 

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A brave new world


This blog has been constructed so that divorced parents who have been kept from seeing their children by the “custodial” parent, have an outlet; a voice that might be heard. Somewhere for you to comment about others, and to lift up others who are going through their ordeals that they face. Somewhere for you to gain encouragement when the future seems bleak, and you’re are not sure if you can take one more step forward. It often times is very lonely being a divorced parent, that loneliness is only amplified by selfish and greedy; sometimes just hurtful ex-partners; who wish to sever the bond between a child and their “non-custodial” parent. What’s even worse sometimes, not only do the “custodial” parents keep you at bay, you also have extra-family members dictating their rules also when pertaining to visitation. Maybe you have found solace in your new spouse as I have, or maybe you have thrown yourself into your career, or a hobby. Whatever it is that you do to dull the sting of the loss of companionship of your child(ren), deep inside you know there is a child shaped hole that is just not filled any longer. Having that hole inside you cuts you to the very deepest parts of your soul. Not knowing if your daughter will still ask you to walk her down the aisle, because she hasn’t spoken to you in more than a few years. Not knowing if your son would ask you to be his best man on his special day. Not knowing if you will see your very own grandchildren grow up, or be a part of their life at all, in any way. These may be some thoughts or questions you ask yourself, or better put, torture yourself with. This blog is to let parents know they are not alone in their pain and agony. It is dedicated to those who have had to “let go” much too soon. It is a memorial to all the children who want to see their daddy or mommy; — but are afraid to speak because they don’t want to hurt the other.

Somewhere tonight; a child and a parent are crying out from the depths of their heart to God in heaven, only wanting to be reunited and to begin repairing the relationship that has been damaged and lost.

Robert E. Stage Jr.

 

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